Before I was married people used to ask me, “When are you going to get married?” After I got married the most asked question became, “When are you going to have kids?” Why are people so concerned with my decisions and my future? My husband and I do plan on having children someday, but right now we are enjoying our childfree existence. And here’s the best part— you don’t have to feel sad or sorry for us.
My life is not empty and meaningless just because I don’t have kids yet. I’ve never been the type of girl that dreamed of being a housewife or stay at home mom. In fact, I didn’t decide I wanted kids until I reached my late twenties. I always knew I wanted to get married someday, but having a husband and kids was never my ultimate goal in life. The only real goal I had for myself was to finish college and have a successful career. I knew that if I could do those things everything else in my life would eventually fall into place. And it did.
I love my life. I have a college degree and a full time job in my field of study. I have a wonderful husband, family, and a circle of friends that I wouldn’t trade for the world. Not having kids yet has allowed me the opportunity to travel to different parts of the world. I can go out after work and stay out as late as I want. If I decide I want to sleep in on the weekends until noon, I can do that, too. I can even fly out to Chicago for the weekend at a moments notice if I want to see my best friend.
I know that my life will change completely when I have kids and it won’t be just about me anymore. So until I’m ready for that responsibility I’m going to continue having fun and being selfish. Some people might not agree with that response, but it’s the truth.
If your goals or dreams are like mine and don’t revolve around having kids, that’s great. If your dreams involve a family and a house with a white picket fence, that’s great, too. My decision to wait to have kids is just that— MY decision. It might not be right for you, but it’s right for me.